• Dad: *Yelling at the TV.*
• Me: "Like they are actually going to hear you."
• Dad: "You love boys who don't know you exist."
• Me: "Don't talk to me."

At school...

• Me: I hate you all, you're all idiots.
• Me: Why is that person staring at me.
• Me: I wonder if this is how One Direction felt at school.
• Me: Omg what would happen if a man just burst in the room with a gun. I would totally be the heroic person who sacrifices themselves for others.
• Me: No I don't know the answer to this question. Oh god, the teacher's going to call on me. My hand is not raised. Oh god oh god oh god, leave me alone. Act busy, just act busy. Abort mission, I repeat, abort mission.
• Me: My stomach jut growled. When the fuck is lunch.
• Me: We should make a class Hunger Games. Except everyone dies, and I marry Josh Hutcherson.
• Me: AND NOW MY PENCILS BREAKING, AND YOU ONLY WANT ME WHEN I'M TAAAKENNNN.
• Me: No, seriously, never open your mouth again.
• Me: Ew, my teacher has children. They're sexually active. I wonder when they had sex for the first time. I wonder if they did drugs as a teenager. I totally bet they did.
• Me: Yeah, no, if a man walked in with a gun, I totally wouldn't sacrifice myself for these idiots. I would hide under my desk and tell him to just take them all.
• Me: Zayn would be the hottest English teacher, oh my god, I would pull an Aria and do dirty things to him on his desk.
• Me: Seriously, it's only been a minute.
• Me: I love One Direction.
• Me: I will never use this shit in my life.